Thursday, February 16, 2006

An awesome Bad Singer Thursday contest!!!


As some of you may know (but will never admit), former Creed frontman and spectacularly bad drama-rock singer Scott Stapp has released a solo album. Ever since reading about it on Tbogg’s site, I’ve had the idea for a contest percolating in my head. I thought it would be fun if I took some excerpts of Mr. Stapp’s amazingly-bad lyrics and mixed them in with fake amazingly-bad lyrics of my own devising. Then, I’d ask my small and long-suffering readership to see if they can pick out the fake Scott Stapp lyrics. Sounds like a great idea, doesn’t it?

What’s that you say? It doesn’t sound like any fun at all?

Well, too bad because we’re doing it anyway. What follows are five mindnumbingly shitty song excerpts. Three of which come from Scott Stapp’s new solo album, two of which I wrote myself. Try to guess which ones are real and which ones are fake. Don’t cheat, either. If you get them all correct–who knows?–maybe I’ll even offer you a lame prize of some sort.

Although, if I were you, I wouldn’t get too excited about that part.

Anyway, here we go:

1)
An old man walking down the road
Stopped beside me for help with his load
Told me, son, this world keeps goin’ round
Friends are lost, friends are found
Friends we love buried six feet underground

2)
A wounded man sounds desperate when he's lost all his belief
Can you look into my eyes and say you won't betray me
We're running out of time
How precious time can be
I'm counting all the moments of the times you could have helped me”

3)
I met a man in New Orleans wore a half suit with dark blue jeans
Kicked his heels together winked at me real nice.
I saw him from a mile away,
But in my state of mind I let him make his play
"Hey boy... have you seen the other side"
Yeah...in this man I saw the devil's hand so I looked at him man to man said
"This time it's gonna be a fight!"

4)
Here I am, baby, wounded and betrayed
Wounded and betrayed
But you’ve got to know, I’m not afraid
No, I’m not afraid
You took my heart and ran away
So far away, so far away
But oh! baby I’m not afraid
Not afraid of you

5)
So what am I supposed to do
When all I've got is God and you
I guess I'll trust the one I can't see
As I sit here on this park bench
Knowing what you are thinking
I wonder how you close your eyes to sleep